Month: December 2015

Ten Fear Responses That Make No Sense, And Why We Have Them

Posted on by mollywittier

Good writing!

World of Horror

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Nature, we are told, equipped us with all sorts of instincts to help us survive. However, most of them just get us into trouble. Especially the fear response ones. It’s true that we live in a very different world than the primates who evolved these responses, but often what we do when we’re afraid doesn’t seem to make sense even in nature. Let’s take a look at why we’re cursed with some lousy responses to everyday scares.

10. Sweating

Humans are social creatures. That’s why we keep grouping together in big cities even though we clearly hate each other. Exploding into a ball of salty liquid is no good when you are trying to tell a harmless little social lie like claiming you didn’t ding the car door of the big angry man with the baseball bat. And yet there’s always the general adrenal response. When people get nervous their…

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The Holidays

Posted on by mollywittier

Seems time was slower in the past. And it seems my mind could live more in the moment rather than being cluttered with things I must do, have put off doing, am trying to ignore, am trying to prioritize and so on.

I see the beautifully decorated homes that I drive by and wonder how long it took them to put up those lights and decorations. How long will they stay up? And how long will it take you to take them down and put them away. I tire just thinking about it. I can’t imagine having to do all that work for a few weeks or even days worth of display for mostly others to see briefly, for a few seconds as they drive by. Is it worth it?

It reminds me how I don’t understand big functions like weddings. I can not undertand the time, effort or money going into one day’s celebration.

But I have drifted off.

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve once again. Next week another new year. I wish it could all be slowed down. I can not pick up speed in myself to keep up with it, if that makes sense. I should be doing more, moving faster, thinking quicker to keep up the pace. Seems time is passing me by and I am standing still. And yet I am aging fast.

The problem with thinking you are young is that one day you look in the mirror and ask what happened, who are you? If you are taken for 10 years younger or even more, and date 10 years younger or even more and you are a woman, that day comes abruptly. Suddenly you, in number, are seemingly upon middle age yet still look like a kid. And all of a sudden you grow up and can not enjoy that in between time and you must jump from young to old immediately without settling for a while in between. And people see you so differently. They react so differently to you. Once you were a beauty and all eyes on you, now you are invisible and a burden. And I am not even yet a senior and this is the case. Invisible is what you are when you are a woman, middle-eged, living in the United States.

So these are my reflections this a.m. the day befoe Christman Eve, 2015.

Merry Christmas.

Errands

Posted on by mollywittier

Today appears to be a lovely mild autumn day outside. The sun is shining, birds are chirping. I sit inside, tired, overwhelmed. I am so overwhelmed I want to go back to sleep. But I have so much to do. The more I have to do, usually, the more I want to sleep.

So much rests on my shoulders. So much responsibilty and so much stress. And I am the only one who can do those things that need to be done. As the tears roll down my cheek, I wonder, can I do it, have I forgotten something that has a time constraint? And I think to myself how much of it can I put off until tomorrow. And pressure is added that the holidays are almost here, and simple fun stuff needs to come into the equation and added to the neccessary tedious things to be done. How much time do I give to each? What balance can I achieve?

Hence, I want to sleep.

But I can not. Too much to do. Busy, busy. Today I will go see my therapist who, for one reason, or another I have not seen in a month. I have managed to survive the month, but the stress has built. I do not want stress to be a factor in my life that will make me ill.

My immediate concern:

1-Shall I rake the leaves now or later.
2-Shall I return library books now or later.
3-Shall I buy bug traps now or later.
4-Shall I pick up prescription medications now or later.
5-Shall I shower today or wait till the next few days.
6-Shall I nap now or later.

Have you noticed I am a bit of a procrastinator?

As the dishwasher and the washing machine and dryer churn.
I sound very much like a homemaker, although that is not part of how I would define myself.

I never understood people when they constantly said they were out doing errands, they were busy doing errands, they could not join me for coffee because they had to do errands. I thought they were making up an excuse to not do something. I think in much of my adulthood, until recently, I had no errands to do. I would think to myself, what is this strange notion called errands. Now I know.

Crying helps, it is a release. Sleep helps too.

Time to get up and do something. Now.

Drifting Thoughts

Posted on by mollywittier

Today starts a new adventure for me. What is it I am looking for. I don’t know or I know too much. I am looking for so much, will this help me get there? Possibly, step by step. What am I saying? How will I approach this, my new blog. What do I want to share. What do I have to say.

So many thoughts cross my mind. Clarity will come with time.

Today I chose to start as these are turbulent times we and I personally live in. How do we and I personally cope? We shall see.

I am all over the place but need to be here. Will this ground me? Will you, the reader get something from my ramblings? Will we go through this together?

On the road, to see what we can find.

I look forward to it. Join me, will you? Let’s now have some tea, shall we?

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